Come to Western for the 'Wild Wings'

By: Jeff Henderson

Posted: 3/28/08

The end of the year is approaching, which means the time has come to show off our great town and help the recruitment efforts for our school. Pass this along to your high school buddies next time you see them.

Of course, most high school graduates have already looked into reasons why one school is better than another, but just like the real estate business says, the most important rule in searching for a college is "Location, location, location."

But what should you look for in a location? You may notice, at least in the Midwest, most colleges are strategically hidden in the center of the largest area of nowhere possible. Inside this mass of nothingness (i.e., corn), you will find a college town much like Macomb.

But the only way for out-of-towners to see if Macomb really is a great place is to come visit firsthand. Pack those energy drinks, MapQuest directions and head down to Macomb.

Keep in mind Macomb isn't quite known for illustrious top-tier developments, but it is still a manageable place to live for college. However, if you have high-maintenance needs and demand state-of-the-art technologies like water, you'll want to turn the car around and look somewhere else.

But anyway, you made the trip and have now entered the town. You decide to drive around and check out the scenery and can't help but notice there are no humans around. You thought the population was more than 20,000 but figure you must have been wrong.

You are not wrong. The only reason you do not see anyone is because every soul has apparently migrated to the mesmerizing landing of an alien facility known only as Buffalo Wild Wings.

We are all waiting hours to be seated because the food is pretty darn good, and we don't mind if whatever planet this thing came from has and/or idolizes flying buffaloes with tiny white wings. In fact, the line is so big, I have been waiting for seemingly hours on end just for my ticket number to be called … for the bathroom.

But let's get back to the tour. You have a lot to get to. I have devised a plan for you to see all the other major sights of Macomb in just two hours, allowing you to get back home before dark.

The first thing you're going to want to do is visit Buffalo Wild Wings and get some lunch before your tour. Figure the wait will take 45 minutes, and you'll sit down and eat for another hour.

You may be wondering if it's really a good idea to use an hour and 45 minutes out of the two-hour plan for lunch. Perhaps you are right. Fifteen minutes is way too much time to tour Macomb. Better stay for dessert.

As for the rest of the tour, I should let you know where different businesses are. You will need to know where to go for stuff like groceries, clothes, candy, toys, greeting cards, electronic devices, cold medicines, places for oil changes, restaurants, banks and for those with glasses or contacts, an optometrist. For all of these needs, go to Wal-Mart. That should just about do it.

But if Macomb doesn't seem to have quite the pizzazz you're looking for, do not worry. Remember, we have about as many liquor-licensed establishments as we do fast food restaurants.